Legend of the Female General – CH 103

Chapter 103. The Woman the Commander Deeply Loved.

The twenty-three unclaimed female corpses were eventually buried at Ride the Wind Terrace outside Liangzhou City, just as Xiao Jue had said. Standing on Ride the Wind Terrace and looking down, the valley was shrouded in mist and clouds, like a fairyland.

The coffins were all of the finest quality, paid for with silver from the Sun family’s treasury. Over the years, the Sun family had amassed immense wealth, even building a dedicated treasury within their estate to store gold, silver, and treasures.

Since the identities and origins of these twenty-three women were unknown, even the tombstones erected for them had no words to carve. Twenty-three blank tombstones marked the resting places of twenty-three young women. If they were aware after death, they could sit here and watch the clouds drift and the skies change. If they were reborn, as Xiao Jue said, they would ride the wind freely, laughing proudly over lakes and mountains.

He Yan and Song Taotao stood not far away, while Chi Wu stood to the side, watching the people squatting on the ground burning paper money. Xiao Jue did not come during the burial. Many of these people burning paper money were relatives who had come searching for missing female family members, but ultimately failed to find them. After all, among the women Sun Ling had killed, many had not even been left with intact bodies, having been devoured by wolves and dogs in the wilderness of the mass graves.

A white-haired old woman was burning paper money in an iron basin. She was so old she could barely walk, and the mountain path had been traversed only because her grandson had carried her up. Her little granddaughter had been abducted by Sun Ling four years ago and had never reappeared. Even among the corpses found in Sun Ling’s courtyard, there was no trace of her little granddaughter.

The old woman trembled as she spoke, “I’m burning paper money for these girls. In the future, if kind-hearted people see my Da Niu’er, they’ll burn paper money for her too… Little girl, may you rest in peace…”

Song Taotao wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes with a handkerchief and said, “Being a woman is too hard. If there’s a next life, I do not want to be a woman.”

“It has nothing to do with being a woman or not,” He Yan said, watching the paper money fluttering in the sky. “Being a woman is not meant to be about suffering, and the same goes for men. If you’re dissatisfied with fate, you can choose a different path. It’s just…” She looked at the blank tombstones. “For them, there was no choice at all. That’s too cruel.”

Song Taotao looked at her. “You’re very different from ordinary men.”

“What?”

“If it were an ordinary man, they’d probably say, ‘What’s so bad about being a woman? You just need to dress beautifully and sit indoors. When you’re cold, someone adds clothes for you; when you go out, someone serves you. You do not have to fight outside. How can you not appreciate the blessings you have?'” She imitated a man’s rough voice, then added disdainfully, “Is being a pet really so great? Locking a bird in a cage and expecting it to praise the cage for being beautiful—I think they’re the ones with problems.”

He Yan chuckled. “You’re very different from ordinary women, too.”

“I’ve always been different. By the way,” Song Taotao looked at her, “I still do not know your name. You’re not Cheng Lisu, are you? You’re Second Young Master Xiao’s subordinate, right?”

“My name is He Yan,” He Yan replied. “The He in firewood, the Yan in ‘peace under heaven.'”

“So it’s Brother He Yan,” Song Taotao said. “You can call me Taotao.”

“This…” He Yan scratched her head. It seemed a bit too intimate. Although they were both women, others did not know that, and in their eyes, it might give rise to misunderstandings.

“Then it’s settled,” Song Taotao declared. “I’ve already spoken with Second Young Master Xiao and arranged to travel with you all to Liangzhou Garrison for now. Once his people arrive, they’ll escort me back to Shuojing. So in the coming days, I’ll likely be staying with you the whole time.” Song Taotao smiled, her eyes curving like crescents. “I’ve never been to a garrison before.” She grew cheerful again, chattering away without end.

“Young Lady Song,” Chi Wu glanced into the distance, “it’s getting late. Allow me to escort you down the mountain first.”

“Let’s go,” He Yan added.

The group began its descent. Behind them, on the steps of the Ride the Wind Terrace, clusters of white chrysanthemums grew among the grass. A gentle breeze stirred, causing the flowers to nod slightly, like graceful young women bidding them farewell.

Before long, they were out of sight.

…

Upon returning to the inn where they were staying, Song Taotao immediately retreated to her room to bathe. Having been busy all day and covered in ash from burning paper offerings earlier, she needed to wash it all off.

With the Sun residence sealed, they naturally could not return there, so they stayed at the same inn as before. The innkeeper, now aware of Xiao Jue’s true identity and how he had brought Sun Xiangfu and his son to justice, dared not show any neglect. The proprietor, behaving more like a servant from some wealthy household than an innkeeper, bustled around He Yan and the others with excessive attentiveness.

He Yan waved him off. “It’s fine, it’s fine. I can manage on my own.” She took a towel and headed straight into her room.

Inside, Fei Nu was packing his belongings and startled at her entrance. He Yan asked, “Brother Fei Nu, what are you doing?”

Fei Nu replied with a wooden expression, “I’m moving in with Chi Wu.”

Back at the Sun residence, the three of them had shared a room—Xiao Jue in the inner chamber and Fei Nu and He Yan in the outer area—without any issue. He Yan remarked casually, “Moving back and forth is such a hassle.”

Fei Nu stopped and stared at her incredulously. “You’re a woman. How can we share a room?”

He Yan: “… You do not have to look so scandalized.”

Fei Nu said nothing, swiftly finishing his packing as if she were some kind of menace to be avoided at all costs, and promptly left.

Now alone in the room, He Yan stood dazed for a moment before shaking her head with a smile. In the eyes of Xiao Jue and his attendants, her behavior must seem quite unexpected. But having spent her previous life in the military barracks, sharing quarters with men was hardly a challenge. She, a young woman, felt no embarrassment, so she could not understand why Fei Nu was so awkward about it.

Walking over to the bed, He Yan noticed a basin of clean water and fresh white bandages on the table, along with hot water for bathing, likely left by Fei Nu. Despite her injuries, this man, much like his master, could seem aloof at times yet unexpectedly considerate at others.

With no one else around, she sat down, loosened her clothing, and gave herself a quick wash. She had not had the chance to examine yesterday’s wounds closely. Removing the old bandages, she realized the cuts were deeper than she’d thought.

It certainly hurt, but it was bearable. He Yan turned to look at the girl in the mirror. The once fair skin now bore knife wounds, undoubtedly marring her appearance.

The original Young Lady He cherished her beauty, pampering herself with the finest lotions and perfumes. Yet here she was, newly arrived and already disfigured. If the real Young Lady He were to return and see herself in such a state, she would surely faint from fury.

She had been very careful to protect herself, but once she decided to rely on herself to venture out and lost the shelter of her family, injuries were inevitable. People grow through being wounded time and again, and scars will one day turn into armor.

A female general’s body could never be as flawless as that of an ordinary girl. Old scars were scattered across it like a painting slashed haphazardly by a strange knife—hardly beautiful, even terrifying.

What girl did not love beauty? Even though He Yan had lived as a man for over a decade in her past life, after returning to women’s attire and seeing the knife scars on her back and body, she still felt ashamed when facing Xu Zhiheng. She never wore thin gauze clothing. Once, Xu Zhiheng gifted her a water-lotus-colored pomegranate gauze skirt, embroidered with pomegranate flowers at the shoulders and neck, as thin as a cicada’s wings. She loved it but never wore it, all because an enemy’s arrow had pierced her shoulder on the battlefield long ago, leaving a scar that could never be erased when the arrow was pulled out.

She also remembered the look in Xu Zhiheng’s eyes when he saw those scars. Though he said nothing, he deliberately avoided looking at them, which hurt more than outright disgust.

He Yan stared blankly into the bronze mirror. Why were scars considered medals on men but shameful on women? How unfair it was—simply because the world took it for granted that women served others with their looks and had to maintain their appearance at all times.

Utter nonsense.

He Yan lowered her head, carefully applied ointment to the wound, and wrapped it with cloth strips. She was adept at these tasks, not even frowning when it hurt, and finished quickly. After completing everything, she rested in the room for a moment before rising, pushing the door open, and heading to Xiao Jue’s room.

The room was lit, and Xiao Jue was likely inside. He Yan knocked on the door: “Commander?”

“Come in.”

Pushing the door open, she saw Second Young Master Xiao putting away the Wanxiang qin on the table. If not for this, He Yan had almost forgotten that he had come to Liangzhou City to repair the qin. Speaking of repairing the qin, she recalled how she had gotten drunk and crushed his qin back then.

“Commander,” He Yan began, steeling herself, “have you eaten yet?”

Xiao Jue paused his movements: “Speak directly.”

“Are we returning to the garrison tomorrow?” He Yan asked. “How do you plan to deal with me?”

Now that Xiao Jue knew she was a woman, what if he really intended to send her back to Shuojing? She had just found a slight clue about He Rufei—she would rather die than go back.

“How do you hope I deal with you?” Second Young Master Xiao sat down at the table, looking at her leisurely.

He Yan quickly pulled a stool over and sat beside him, earnestly analyzing, “You’ve seen my abilities now. When you brought me to Liangzhou this time, I was the one who warned you about the assassins and helped divert Yuan Baozhen’s attention. In the end, I killed Ding Yi. If I calculate carefully, I’ve contributed to your efforts even more than Brother Fei Nu.”

Fei Nu sneezed next door.

“Someone like me, as a subordinate, is second to none; as a confidant, I’m understanding and considerate,” He Yan praised herself without hesitation. “With me in the Liangzhou Guard, it’s like adding wings to a tiger. Commander, I believe you could place me in the Jiuqi Battalion—I guarantee you would not regret it.”

Xiao Jue smiled and slowly retorted, “The Jiuqi Battalion?”

“I know the Commander is a straightforward man and must suspect my true motives for insisting on joining the Jiuqi Battalion. I’ll be direct: because ordinary paths to merit and glory are far too slow. I’ve heard that in the Commander’s Jiuqi Battalion, even those who become disabled later can still become officials. My He family is counting on me to bring honor to our ancestors, and I thought the Jiuqi Battalion would be an excellent place for that.”

She spoke these words with utter candor. Xiao Jue picked up the tea from the table and took a sip, then said unhurriedly, “No need for ‘later’—I can see you’re already disabled now.”

He Yan: “… What?” Could Xiao Jue have seen through her identity as Madam Xu, blind in her previous life?

As she tensed up, she saw him point at his own head.

He Yan: “…”

He was the one with something wrong in his head! What kind of person would insult others for no reason?

But when under someone else’s roof, one must bow their head. He Yan forced a smile. “Does the Commander not think so?”

Xiao Jue stared at her and scoffed, “Liar. Our Jiuqi Battalion does not accept incompetents.”

“Incompetents?” Xiao Jue could question her character, but not her abilities. He Yan slammed the table. “Who are you calling incompetent?”

“A piece of trash like Ding Yi—you actually got injured fighting him,” Xiao Jue curled his lip, his beautiful eyes full of mockery. “If that’s not incompetence, what is?”

“That was… that was…” That was because Young Lady He’s body was frail, and after the lessons of her past life, of course she had to be cautious!

“If Brother Fei Nu were there, he would have been injured too!”

“You could put the effort you spend on deception into training, and you might improve a great deal.”

The more familiar he became with her, the more he revealed the mischievous side of his youth. He Yan took a deep breath and suddenly smiled.

“Fine. If the Commander insists on saying that, I do not mind. If you’re prejudiced against me, that’s fine too. It’s just that suddenly, I find myself missing that red mole on the Commander’s waist.”

Xiao Jue’s calm expression cracked instantly.

“Rumors, after all, tend to become truth the more they spread. I’m just the daughter of a city gate captain, from an undistinguished family, with no reputation of my own. To have my name linked with the Commander’s is my good fortune,” He Yan said, standing up and speaking slowly. “In the future, when people speak of me, I’ll have had my moment of glory—as the woman deeply loved by the Commander. Thinking about it, it does not seem like a loss. It’s just a pity that the Commander has to be tied to someone like me, though, since the Commander does not care what others say anyway, it probably does not matter.”

Xiao Jue stared at her, his gaze sharp as a knife, and said in a low voice, “What ‘deeply loved woman’?”

He Yan replied with a beaming smile, “I’m so outstanding that everyone in the Liangzhou Guard knows me and admires me as a rare, fine young man in this world. If they suddenly discover I’m a woman, they’ll surely refuse to believe it and wonder why a woman would join the army. Then I’ll have to say it’s because the Commander loves me so deeply he cannot bear to be apart from me, so he hid me in the barracks and even brought me along when stationed in Liangzhou. Those who hear it will only envy my good luck and, of course, marvel at the Commander’s profound affection.”

Upon hearing this, Xiao Jue did not get angry but instead laughed. “Shameless!”

He Yan leaned on the table, speaking rapidly. “I’m not an unreasonable person. I’m not asking you to pull strings to get me into the Jiuqi Battalion—I just want a chance to prove myself. Let’s return to the garrison together and pretend this never happened. Please set aside your prejudices and treat me like an ordinary soldier. Oh, right,” she seemed to remember something. “I’m injured and need to change my bandages at night. It’s inconvenient to stay with the men, so I’ll trouble you to find me a separate room—one where I can bathe inside.”

Xiao Jue replied coldly, “Do not even think about it.”

“Then I’ll just have to become the woman you deeply love,” He Yan turned away indifferently. “Even if you stuff me into a carriage and send me back to Shuojing, I can spread the word immediately. Hmm, this inn seems perfect. All I need to do is scream—”

Xiao Jue rubbed his forehead. “He Yan!”

He Yan smiled with hidden malice. “What can I say? I’m a liar.”

Xiao Jue said, “I agree.”

He Yan’s expression changed faster than the innkeeper’s three-year-old child. She patted her chest regretfully. “It’s a shame I could not become the woman you deeply love.”

Xiao Jue’s face turned livid. “Get out!”

He Yan hummed a cheerful tune as she left.

…

Early the next morning, when Fei Nu and Chi Wu woke up and stepped outside, they found He Yan was already up before them.

Perhaps because they were returning to the Liangzhou Guard, she had taken extra care with her appearance, choosing one of Cheng Lisu’s less frequently worn outfits. She looked refreshed and spirited. With her delicate features, if Fei Nu had not known she was a woman, he would have inwardly praised her as a handsome young man.

Chi Wu, unaware of He Yan’s identity, crossed his arms and watched from a distance, whispering to Fei Nu, “You said this person is unmatched in the Liangzhou Guard? Looking at his build, it does not seem like it.”

Fei Nu sighed, thinking that was not the only thing that did not seem right.

Just then, Song Taotao came upstairs, holding a handful of red dates. Seeing He Yan, she naturally extended her hand and smiled. “Brother He, these are dates from the innkeeper. They’re very sweet. Would you like to try one?”

Liangzhou was known for its red dates—large, sweet, and delightfully red. He Yan accepted them and said, “Thank you.”

The pair of young man and woman standing there made a pleasing sight, inviting speculation. Chi Wu nudged Fei Nu’s arm and teased, “Something seems off. Could Young Lady Song have taken a liking to He Yan? What about Young Master Cheng?”

Fei Nu gave him a complicated look. “… Why are you worrying about such things?”

“How can you call it unnecessary worry? Young Master Cheng is the young master’s nephew. Of course, we should help him. Should I teach that kid a lesson in private and make him stay away from Young Lady Song? Our Young Master Cheng is pure-hearted and kind—no match for He Yan. Look, look at the way he’s smiling at Young Lady Song. Tsk, tsk, I cannot stand it.”

“Keep your opinions to yourself. The young master hates gossips,” Fei Nu said. “Let’s just focus on our duties.”

Chi Wu was about to say more when the door to the room opened, and Xiao Jue stepped out.

“Commander,” He Yan greeted him warmly.

Xiao Jue acted as if he had not seen her, passing by without so much as a glance. He asked Fei Nu, “Is the carriage ready?”

“Waiting downstairs,” Fei Nu replied.

“Let’s go.” He headed downstairs.

Chi Wu and Fei Nu exchanged a glance. Chi Wu whispered, “Did that He guy offend our young master?”

“Let’s get to work,” Fei Nu replied without answering, following him downstairs.

“Second Young Master Xiao is as cold as ever,” Song Taotao remarked, taking He Yan’s side, which touched her. The young girl sympathetically said, “Working under him must be difficult. When I return to Shuojing, I’ll speak to my father and see if I can find you an official position in the capital. With your skills and character, it should not be hard.”

“Huh?” He Yan had not expected Song Taotao to have such plans and waved her hand dismissively. “That will not be necessary. Thank you for your kindness, Young Lady Song, but I’m doing fine in Liangzhou Guard. General Xiao is not an unreasonable person—he’s actually quite good. It’s an honor to work under him.”

Song Taotao thought she was just defending Xiao Jue and disagreed. “What makes him worth following? People in Shuojing say he’s cold and heartless…”

Though Xiao Jue’s temper was not the best, He Yan could not bring herself to slander him unjustly. She smiled and said, “He may not be perfect, but did he not find a way to make the Sun father and son who bullied you face trouble? If he were truly bad, why would he care about the unclaimed female bodies dug up from Sun Xiangfu’s residence, bury them properly, and invite monks to pray for their souls?”

“But…” Song Taotao still wanted to argue.

The young man gently patted her head and said warmly, “Young Lady Song, you’re still young and do not yet understand that many things are not as they seem on the surface, and many people’s true character is only revealed through interaction. Those who treat you kindly and considerately are not necessarily good people, and those you perceive as cold and heartless villains may have hidden sides to them.”

Song Taotao was stunned. Before she could process this, He Yan had already headed downstairs. The lingering warmth from the young man’s palm on her head made her blush, and she quickly hurried after him, muttering under her breath, “What do you mean, ‘still young’? You’re not much older than me, either.”

In the end, she did not continue the argument.

He Yan smiled to herself, recalling Xiao Jue’s words from the day before, spoken to those pitiful women.

“Outside Liangzhou, there is a peak called Ride the Wind. These women were trapped like caged birds and fish in a pond during their lifetimes. Burying them there, may they ride the wind freely in their next life and roam the lakes and mountains with pride.”

He understood the despair of those women, which was why he could say such things.

So, she magnanimously forgave Xiao Jue for his rudeness toward her and chose not to dwell on his harsh behavior.

After all, gentle souls were rare in this world.

As she went downstairs, she saw Xiao Jue standing in front of the carriage and walked over to ask, “Commander, will you share the carriage with me?”

Since Song Taotao was still a young girl, and they had ridden horses on the way here, they could not very well have her ride back on horseback. Fei Nu had arranged for two carriages.

Xiao Jue turned his head to look at her.

He Yan explained, “I cannot share a carriage with Young Lady Song. If others saw us alone together, a man and a woman, what would happen to her reputation?”

Xiao Jue asked, “So?”

“So, I should share a carriage with you, Commander,” He Yan said with a grin, trying to climb into the carriage, only to be pulled back by the collar of her clothes by Xiao Jue.

If she had not grabbed his sleeve, she might have lost her balance.

“Do you not consider yourself a woman, or do you not consider me a man?” He raised an eyebrow. “Deceiver, I fear you’ve gotten too deep into your role, so I’m reminding you. The mission is over; you do not need to act like Cheng Lisu anymore.” With that, he disdainfully brushed off the sleeve that He Yan had just grabbed.

Chi Wu happened to pass by and overheard Xiao Jue’s last words. He immediately came over, grabbed He Yan’s clothes, and pulled her aside. “Exactly! Still thinking you’re Young Master Cheng? How can you be so clueless? Come over here and ride with us!”

He Yan had only been joking and had not actually intended to ride with Xiao Jue. She promptly mounted her horse.

Fei Nu instructed the coachman, “There’s a woman in the carriage, so do not go too fast.”

He Yan was taken aback for a moment, then could not help but laugh. It was not that she was being overly sentimental—it was just that she had been injured in her fight with Ding Yi and could not ride too vigorously.

Who knows if this was intentional or not? She was also a girl, after all.

Chi Wu said, “What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”