Mo Sang – CH 357

Postscript

This is probably the book with the best update attitude I’ve ever had. I hope the next one will be even better, especially in terms of updates.

This is also the book I enjoyed writing the most.

I finished reading it one last time today, wrote “The End,” and sat in front of the computer. I have many feelings, but mostly, I feel happy and relaxed.

This is also the book I’ve finished with the most joy and relaxation in over ten years of writing.

When I wrote Nine Perfections, besides exam essays and official documents, I had only posted three or five threads on forums. I was a complete novice (although I’m not young anymore).

Nine Perfections was very immature. Even after all these years, I’ve never reread it because I always feel a wave of shame and embarrassment when I do. I feel so ignorant.

By the time spring came, I had gained some insights. Everything around me was going smoothly then, and my mood was warm and happy. This is reflected in the book, as you often say, “Spring warmth brings warmth.”

When Liu Zhan (榴绽) was published, Xian encountered difficulties. She was dissatisfied with her writing at the time but didn’t know where to go next or even what was wrong; it was just an intuitive dissatisfaction.

Liu Zhan was canceled.

After Liu Zhan, a very experienced publisher had a long talk with Xian. He said, “Don’t think about breaking through; you just need to calm down and cultivate what you’re good at.”

So, she calmly wrote her next book, but it was exhausting.

Her next book, A Noble Wife (名门贵妻), was a complete flop, as you all know.

That was also the most difficult year of Xian’s life.

Some say that writing is thinking; writing itself is a process of dissecting life and oneself.

Whether others feel this way, I don’t know, but Xian felt this way.

After writing for four or five years, Xian’s self-awareness collapsed.

During that year, Xian went from under 100 pounds to over 140 pounds.

At night, unsure whether I was asleep or awake, events from my earliest childhood vividly resurfaced before my eyes. These weren’t my previous understandings but rather a different perspective, completely different, even the opposite.

The agonizing collapse of that year is something I don’t want to dwell on. My memory is of Shanghai during that time—it rained every day, the sky overcast, everything damp and gloomy.

Thanks to my children and family, I was able to weather that darkest period.

After that, Jin Tong came along. A bit stiff, but it’s what I wanted to write, and you all enjoyed it. That’s wonderful.

Writing this book today, I feel more relaxed and happy than ever before.

Perhaps it’s because of this relaxed and happy feeling that you enjoyed reading it, right?

An author’s emotions cannot be hidden, at least not mine.

I’m approaching fifty; I don’t like the phrase “nearly fifty,” so I won’t use it!

The advantage of this age is that I’ve experienced enough, my heart has broadened and become more at peace, and I can take a detached view of worldly matters.

This allows me to focus on writing itself, finding joy in it for myself and for others.

This is true now, and it will be true in the future.

This postscript is rambling and disjointed, so let it be.

Finally, I want to say this to everyone:

Writing is first and foremost about my own enjoyment, and if it brings you joy, then I experience double, tenfold, a hundredfold happiness!

When you read my work, enjoying the reading experience is the most important thing.

As for donations and votes, I’m a commercial writer, and this is how I make a living. It’s necessary to occasionally give a shout-out. If you feel happy giving me donations or votes, then let’s be happy together!

If you don’t feel happy, then just ignore it.

After all, everyone must first be responsible for themselves.

I hope that each of you can first be responsible for yourselves and truly love yourselves!

I love you all!